Huge news. Dead people are now polling over 90% for Joe. They feel like he’s truly one of them and will finally give a voice to the Doornail Community. That’s tough news for Warren, Sanders and Booti-boing-boing since Deceased-Americans form a significant and reliable slice of the Democrat voter pie. Looks like the nomination is Joe’s to lose.
EARL OF TAINT 
How true, how true … but why is Ol’ Joe not sucking the corpse’s fingers?
Give him time, double aneurysms slow a man down.