WELCOME TO THE RIGHTLY GUIDED:

They’re trying everything to get viewers back. This approach seems to target a rather narrow audience demographic. They do feature some exciting new sport competitions, though it’s widely held that most events will only appeal to the man-hating, bull-dyke style Lebesian community.

Checkout their twist on the classic lawn game of croquet, where players hit TWO balls instead of one.  CNN’s own Sally Kohn is a former state champion Smacker currently vying for her first national title in the first annual Planned Parenthood/Chaz Bono Ball Buster Tournament of Champions.  She’s also set to host her own program where she will coach aspiring Racker-Jacker-Clacker-Smackers on how to Krush Em Like Kohn.

Social Justice Naggers can kiss my Covfefe ass. Butt out of everyone else’s business. Stick to your own knitting. Live and Let Live.  Or it’s War.

Oh fuck it, it’s already War.  Prepare your pitiful anuses, Snowflakes.  Winter is Coming.

Why the coonskin cap?, you might ask.  Too lazy to do a whole parka and a ushanka would be perhaps viewed as inappropriate.  Also coonskin caps are American Made. MAGA.

He’s only winged her

Hard call. They all seem real…

It really works.

Like this example where we’ve worked our magic on Debbie Washerwoman Schultz and made her look much more visually pleasing than in actual real life. (And don’t try checking this out yourselves – eye to eye contact with Deb has turned men to stone.)

But while making her look fabulous, we also cleverly added a naughty hidden message in the form of an image. Can you spot it?  Ha-ha, look carefully because it’s there. And we hope it happens to her soon. She’s had it coming for years.

One of the best of my life, actually.  We should declare a new national holiday, in honor of Covfefe. Someone pick the day.

George Stephanopoulos has tiny, dangly, sawed-off, little boy legs. And this is a true story.

Time to look at CNN’s latest obsession obsessions

This was an actual Carl Bernstein quote.

Poor Fredo. He’s not dumb like they say…he’s SMAHT!

This is why professional journalists refuse to investigate Democrats. But Chris wouldn’t listen. Just dumb.

(Lots of Italians here, huh? Weird. I just noticed.)

Taking over the World? He’s doing that now.