Tag Archives: Sunday Special

Focus On Native America

Back to the Indians, not done yet. Full confession, like millions of other Americans I have Indian blood, right here in my veins. You heard me. My maternal great grandfather was a noble Modoc alcoholic, from Oregon. Mom was one-fourth making me one-eighth. Or maybe less, nobody knows for certain if Great-Grandpa Chug-Ah-Lug was a full-bred brave himself.

Regardless. Racial purity is irrelevant, Obama codified this. I have standing. I can point and laugh all I want, these are my people. Therefore I have formed an NPO dedicated to those of us that dress up and play Indian whenever there’s a protest or other reason to get on TV. These efforts do so much to maintain the mystique and mystery of our shared ancient cultures and beliefs, they deserve a brighter spotlight and a more prominent place in our crowded collective psyche.

We Shall Endeavor To Persevere…

The first installment. We invite all inquiries on future featured events.

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Next week: Modern day warriors re-enact historic raid on Smithwick Middle School PTO Pancake Supper. We’re told they took ‘heap many’ scalps…all for charity, of course.

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One dozen ‘warriors’ from the Moobi tribe carpooled in from Red Stick reservation to recreate the 1766 ritualized slaughter of defenseless pioneers for a local PTO fundraiser. Seven attendees were treated at the scene for anxiety. One re-enacter was treated for a lacerated nipple.

And then there’s this…

Pot Hole, ND/MFNS   After studying the attendance at the North Dakota pipeline protests and festivals like Woodstock, Coachella and Burning Man, organizers and activists have teamed up with concert and outdoor event producers to develop the first ever protest-oriented theme park. The working name is HippieLand but discussions are ongoing.

Well they’ve talked about it anyway. Real talk, not just a buzz. It’s a seriously great idea. Yeah, yeah,  funding and revenue projections and stuff are all pending, man.

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Furthermore…

Presidential hopeful Senator Elizabeth Warren (aka “Little Big Liz”) has a new book out wherein she pretends she does something that would be insanely satisfying to leftists everywhere… but it’s all just a dream. Sales are sluggish.

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