1. CNN Panem – Newly Devolved Soihomo rectumrimmerus Species Shows Baleen Maw to Pre-process Raw Soy.

    Nicknamed “Beato,” this never before catalogued Soihomo was captured swimming in the bottom of a Boy Scout camp outhouse near Lake Tawakoni Texas.

    Professional Experts at the Castration Institute of Palo Alto, California state baleen enlargement indicates increasing physiological estrogen demand in successive generations are necessary to sustain development and maintenance of mangina-to-front hole transition.

    In totally unrelated news, the CDC and FDA Joint Feminization Task Force announced today mandatory higher concentrations of soy in processed food together with aerial spraying of Atrazine nationwide. No reason was given.

  2. He(?)must have sustained permanent lip damage as a result of an unfortunate fellatio accident.


    A classic trio of comments. EN-joyed ’em. In fact, gonna steal ’em.
    I will, however, modify the SPAM acronym to apply to Booker, as in “Someone Posing As Memorable.”

    Or maybe Feinstein, as in “Senator Posing As Meaningful.”

    1. What do I know who’s queer? I think he’s married to a woman. Otherwise it’s just the usual lib democrat no-chance-in-hell fuckwittery, reported by the press as a strong contender with a chance for upset. Next they’ll report the significance of Beatme’s almost winning as good news for the next time. Only it won’t be.

  4. Well, you know everything, Earl, so I figured maybe you heard something. I was under the assumption that Beto was squatting in front of Willie Nelson, and getting Willie’s rusty, dusty, flaccid nozzle stuffed up his fundament.

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