Reporting for MFNS Sports in PoongChang, South Korea
Well, I was hoping to report on the performance of the North Korean athletes today but they all failed to appear. No one was too worried about it and they were eventually located a few miles out of town, collected and returned safely to team officials.
Seems their tour bus had broken down right next to the city landfill and their Minders unknowingly allowed them off the bus, to pee. The athletes soon caught the sharp aroma of savory fermented delicacies they had not seen or tasted for decades and they lost control. Like they were starving or something.