Monthly Archives: February 2018

Every Day’s A Holiday Without Hillary

A poster to bring you daily joy. I made it large so you can print it out for your family room or wherever.  Or make it into a greeting card that you can send anytime of the year. Maybe scare some of your friends, family and co-workers – so they don’t forget. We must never forget. Always remember to never forget. >bing! new motto!<

It’s also an effective and fully natural birth control device. Just try it! (Warning  – effects may be permanent. Maybe you shouldn’t look.)

 

face

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A Short Quiz

comforter in chief

National Security Council – Summer 2016

The anti-Hillary memes, comments and shitposts were flooding social media…and they weren’t all created by Americans. An urgent meeting of the NSC was called, to formulate a sharp response to the clear evidence of nefarious foreign meddling in America’s sacred democratic institutions.

This was the point where things really got rolling.

nsc

They’re Tiny Little Sawed-Off Sumbitches

OK first off, a scale for reference. Pence and Moon measurements are documented. Kim Yo Jong’s height is estimated, accordingly. She is about 5’2″ tall.

size

This photo of Kim Yo Bish standing with these North Korean soldiers has not been manipulated in any way. Clearly, these troops show signs of shrinkage. None are taller than the 5’2″ young woman. Is this the People’s Extra Small Emergency Auxiliary Backup Brigade? Are they just underfed? Why do they all have the resting bitch face…except her?

We point this out in the interest of public education, so you know more about our world.

tiny soldiers

Star Trek The Motion Picture

The very first ST movie, remember?  “V’GER“?

A Voyager spacecraft got sucked through a black hole and became self-aware and eventually built itself into an energy-sucking destroyer of worlds in search of its Creator.

You see where I’m going with this.  No? Well here’s pictures then.

1teslatesla

Actively Mass Murdering Organization Pushes Back On Latest Activist Assertions That Other Groups Will Cause More Deaths In The Children Community

Saying it’s time to stand their ground, Planned Parenthood president Cecile Richards issued a defiant statement against recent claims by unknown activists that organizations like the NRA now stand as a greater danger to the lives of our children than any other threat known to peoplekind.

“We’re averaging over 350,000 dead babies a year. On purpose. For big money. The NRA on the other hand…they’ve yet to rip just one child limb to limb. Zippo. Nada. They don’t even have the right scissors. So tell us again who’s the real Number One Killer?  Thank you.”

cecile

A Dog And A Cat Thing

Something I’ve never really done. But this image just struck me as illustrative of one real downside to being a cat.  No matter what gets on you…you are compelled to lick it all off.  You have to eat it.  Just something I think about. As a taxpayer, maybe.

JUST WASHED THAT

Portrait Of The Moose

Moose

What If….?

Nah. I’m pretty sure this couldn’t happen.

starzero2

Olympics Update

Reporting for MFNS Sports in PoongChang, South Korea

Well, I was hoping to report on the performance of the North Korean athletes today but they all failed to appear.  No one was too worried about it and they were eventually located a few miles out of town, collected and returned safely to team officials.

Seems their tour bus had broken down right next to the city landfill and their Minders unknowingly allowed them off the bus, to pee.  The athletes soon caught the sharp aroma of savory fermented delicacies they had not seen or tasted for decades and they lost control.  Like they were starving or something.

opportunity

They Didn’t Choose My Portrait, Dang.

I sent it to them for free because I knew they’d be needing one and who knows this guy’s face better than me, right?  Well they obviously did and that’s why they went with that other artist’s version. Which is OK I guess but mine totally nails the vegetation better.

wee-weed

2018 Winter Olympics Report

On official credentialed assignment for MFNS right here in PoonChang Korea.  First pics up are Figure Skating.  I don’t know why I haven’t watched more of these dazzling contests but I spent most of the day making up for it. Amazing displays of form and positioning.

Oh, and the cheerleader squads were cool. The North Korean team got all the press but the Norwegians were the crowd favorite. Both groups smelled strongly of fish.

cheers

Last, we did manage to grab one shot of the North Korean Speed Skating Team elimination finals. Note the cheer squad girls are holding masks honoring their favorite athlete.

skaters