Now Jingle Bells Is Racist?

A Boston College Professor of Theater History has said this is so.

Well…after a great deal of research into the song’s origins, we -sadly- are forced to agree. The original title wasn’t even “Jingle Bells”. Take a look at this cover for the original sheet music. The songwriter’s intent could not be more obvious.


That title never stuck as the public named it “Jigga Bells” instead – in reference to the song’s original chorus. And then we found this old card, from the 1920s. Just horrible. Now we have to purge Santa and Mrs Claus too.  And tear down all their statues.

Sorry if this poops on anyone’s Holidays. We have to report the news as it’s made.


A Shameful Stain On Our History, Indeed

12 responses to “Now Jingle Bells Is Racist?

  1. silvestris December 15, 2017 at 10:42 pm


  2. SafeSpace December 16, 2017 at 7:38 am

    Lump of coal in Earl’s Christmas stocking, for sure.

  3. deBoyle December 16, 2017 at 3:15 pm

    Okay, I’ll be the one to ask. Why’s ‘e hoarse? Is ‘e singing AND loping? What’s ‘e singing? And what’s with the abbreviated he? It’s not e’en clever.

  4. Lee Van Queef II December 16, 2017 at 3:44 pm

    If milk is rayciss, then by gum so is frozen precipitation. Just don’t tell them white is the sum of all colors, black the absence. You know, because the faggots are rainbows and thus rayciss.

  5. woodsterman December 16, 2017 at 6:23 pm

    Who cares? Them other folk celebrate quonsear or something like that.

  6. jw burns December 16, 2017 at 8:58 pm

    That’ll really cause early pronation wear on the old Air Jordans.

    Been offline for a while Earl. Touch of the old quotidian ague. Merry Christmas to the House of Taint.


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