Breakthrough Contraceptive For Men Is Now Available – And It Works!

UPDATE UPDATE: Many thanks to MJA at IOTW for the link!

UPDATE: A current roster of Monasteries in America

Keep this card in your wallet. Stare at it for a few seconds prior to any potentially dicey romantic occasion*.  Our patented Instant ED will take effect immediately** – leaving you completely incapable of performing any method of reproductive activity whatsoever.

The Kid is definitely not yours! What a Relief!!


*You strapped on the beer goggles, for example. This cuts right through that fog.

**Only normal heterosexual men were tested.  Your results may vary. Call your doctor if you achieve an erection of any duration, as this might indicate homosexual and/or bestial  tendencies. Stop looking at the card until you know for sure. Or not, like we really care.

15 responses to “Breakthrough Contraceptive For Men Is Now Available – And It Works!

  1. JCscuba September 15, 2017 at 7:55 pm

    You are clearly the MOAB? That was the best among very many I’ve posted, Thanks, Earl, J.C.

  2. GruntOfMonteCristo September 15, 2017 at 10:12 pm

    I found the list of monasteries a welcome alternative to spontaneous, compulsive ritual sudoku. Or seppuku. Especially since the photo of the golden retriever was so seductive compared to Ms. Delauro. Thanks for always leaving a window open, Earl!

  3. SafeSpace September 16, 2017 at 11:49 am

    That’s the child which is born after you f*ck yourself….

  4. Pingback: Breakthrough Contraceptive For Men Is Now Available – And It Works! – IOTW Report

  5. papabear1950 September 17, 2017 at 10:03 am

    When Rosa asked “what sexual position makes the ugliest children” she was told “ask your parents!” I thought it was a photo of Roddy McDowell with Jay Leno’s chin and a surfboard skag added as a nose

  6. Deplorable B Woodman September 18, 2017 at 9:48 am

    Your best ED Control is the pictures in the next post prior with Bradley “Man”ning (I refuse to call “it” Chelsea)

  7. b September 19, 2017 at 7:16 am

    She seems familiar.

    I think it was in Walt Disney’s Sleeping Booty, maybe.

  8. ralph kramden September 19, 2017 at 4:31 pm

    Izzat Keef Richards?

  9. Scooter Van Neuter September 19, 2017 at 5:16 pm

    Oh great, now I can’t find my penis. Thanks for nothing, Earl.


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