Monthly Archives: May 2017

It’s True – She Did It For Years

Then came MAGA


The Obligatory Quarterly PSA (Required For Our FCC License Renewal And Our Social Justice Journalistical CEUs)

We have to run these without compensation – but honestly,  if we can save one citizen from ruining life for everyone else,  it’s totally pretty much worth it.  We hope you all share our faith and by working together, we can find one to fix.

Just one potentially convertible, halfway semi-normal piece of garden variety shit Leftist. Sounds tough, sure but that’s why they call ’em dreams.

So please run out today and buy some of this stuff for someone you maybe hate somewhat less than most of the ringed and tattooed crab magnets you will detect aromatically after checking your shoes and eliminating the possibility that you’ve stepped in dog shit.  (Clean shoes accompanied by a pungent fecal odor typically indicate you got flower children…and they’re inside the wire.) But maybe one of them – just one single flea-ridden skinny dread-locked vegan – was somebody’s cute little baby once.  Please think about possibly caring. Thank you.


000 Is Biden…Joe Biden


Shoving? Remember This Pushover?

In Russia is called Shovski.  Is only for pussies.


Reminder: New National Holiday Tomorrow Commemorates Hillary Clinton Not Being President

Join us as we pause to remember those who would willingly give our lives and fortunes to aid the furtherance of their own greed and ambition.  They stand out as icons within our history, representing what it means to be truly immoral and disgusting human beings.  Beginning tomorrow, we will gather as one community, in gratitude and pride that we kicked Hillary Clinton’s corrupt and nasty ass to the curb – and did not let her be President, forever. Hurrah! Amen.


We never did a thing to try and make her dead (other than hoping and wishing but everybody does that).

To Die For

In solemn and profound honor of the brave Americans who’ve lost their lives in battle. This biscuit’s for you, boys.


Hm. But She Can See The Russians And Comey And The MISOGYNY!

She said she takes full responsibility. Like that means anything to a Clinton.


National Geotardic Special: The Media Pounces

But after 8 years of hand-feeding, their hunting skills have diminished and they are forced to feed on vapor.  Their prey now point and laugh at the desperate attempts to bait or trap something actually edible. It is only a matter of time before this once proud species will have no choice but to eat shit…and die.  It’s Nature’s Way.



The Practice Of Claiming To Have Moral Standards Or Beliefs To Which One’s Own Behavior Does Not Conform

That’s Hypocrisy


Sorry But I’m Not Taking An 8 Year Old To See Ariana’s Flared Outriggers

I just see that as wrong. They’re too young. I was probably 11 or 12 before I first saw an adult human vagina by way of a page torn from a cheap nasty truckstop-style porn mag. It – The V – filled the entire page. Early 70s – picture a big shaggy blanket of pubes encircling a pink raw oyster. I did not view it as anything I would ever care to cuddle and I kept that mindset until I actually put my hands/finger(s) on/in/whatever a real one when we were both 14.  Completely different mindset, thereafter.  But 8 is too young.


This Photo Was Lab-Tested And Certified As Completely Original And Unretouched

The Testicomey


Anderson Cooper Is Professor Pooper

Not many people realize that well known media personality Anderson Cooper is also one of the leading experts and connoisseurs of all things anal in America today. He’s written several peer-reviewed, scholarly studies on the structure, performance, standards and variations of the human anal orifice and his personal collection of superbly preserved sphincters will likely end up in the Smithsonian. Few know poo like Andy Coo.

He’s had his head and several other things well up in thousands of colons, more than most could even imagine – or want to.  So when the conversation turns to dumps, wise people will defer to the expert who puts the anal in analysis. He knows shit.