Honors I’ve Received From Nice People:
Thank You Cousin!
We’re pitching a new reality show – we think it beats the crap out of the Kardashians, particularly if viewers have no overly keen interest in seeing store-bought titties and lab-grown asses. For those viewers, we offer The Obama Bunch.
You probably recognize most or all of our cast, but clockwise from upper left:
Auntie Valerie X, Mama June Moose, Uncle Joe and he dog Stripey, Daughter Melanoma “La Tostada”, The GranMoose, Choom Daddy, Daughter Sarcoma “Salty Biscuit”, Cousin Reggie Love.
Here’s the pilot episode. Joe moves in after Jill throws him out for skinny dippy with a lady UPS driver. Unfortunately he fails to recognize the GranMoose and so enrages her that she puts him in the hospital. (We’ll play laugh tracks, no worries.)
The next episode (if we get picked up) will feature 47 former US Attorneys competing for the right to camp in the Obama’s backyard. Only the top 11 will get to stay inside the wall and the overall champion wins the cozy shed behind the garage. It has a sink.