Monthly Archives: January 2016

Idiot Out Walking Around (IOWA)

idiot out walking around

I Am Disappointed In Ted Cruz

Man.

Not the kind of thing I would expect from Ted. I want to hear his explanation for it because it’s a creepy Big Brother dishonest thing his campaign admits to doing here. A disqualifying kind of thing for me, if he defends and continues it. Hopefully that won’t be the case.

campaign 2016nastygram

Trying To Draw An Analogy Here

Does it work?

Not that a parking violation rises to the level of risking the security of the entire country to shield yourself from the discovery of and accountability for your clandestine activities with Sidney Blumenthal or anything. But the basic attitude is similar in both. The rules don’t apply to her – and other peoples’ lives don’t matter.

analogy

The Economy According To Bernie

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In Respiratory Melt Down, Hillary Coughs Up Emails

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Bill To Advise Hillary On Campaign Tactics And Strategy

Analyzing all sides of the situation, quickly discerning the ideal outcome and formulating the best plan of attack to get there. Bill’s a super genius at that stuff. Hope she listens to him.

free hillary

Go for it, Hil. God knows, you need a rest. It will be a Women’s Prison, OK? All you can eat, knowhatimean? Let your hair down and never wash it. Wear political prisoner thick-framed glasses. Never shave your lip, legs or pits – and no more bikini waxings! Haha-freedom! You can compose and issue your Epic Manifesto! Everyone knows manifestos written in prison are the best kind of manifesto and they sell huge. And then, when you come out all shriveled, old and frail…you’ll be like a Gandhi or Mandela or Mother Teresa! DO IT!

 

Campaign Update: Well It Seems We Have Our First Scandal

I suppose with looks like his, it’s impossible to stop sex-crazed women from wanting him. Couple that with him having just about the biggest heart on him as any man that ever lived and…well, things like this are destined to happen. Oh well.

In un-good news for our fledgling campaign, our front man and stealth Earl has been busted down in the Florida Keys for, allegedly, heisting Trump’s private plane along with its trio of hand picked, young, hot, blonde, bisexual and exceptionally kinky flight attendants. Unverified local reports are stating when Police broke into the motel room, “…Taint (not me, the actor -Ed.) and his hostages were engaged in a drunken, half-naked exhibition of savage girl on girl beatings – which he robustly encouraged in order to satisfy his sick, sadistic, perverted animal urges…” (Again, as much as this may sound like me, I assure you it is not me -Ed.)

smoking junk

In a statement released by his campaign, Taint (not me) maintains his innocence and insists the facts, once known, will back him up. He claims he was in Key Largo to speak before a local group and also take in some deep sea fishing. The outing was successful and he caught several large tuna. He maintains this accounts for his hands bearing the strong odor of fish. When he went back to the motel to clean up, Taint states the girls were already in the room and highly inebriated when he entered. Assuming the inn had made a mistake, he went to phone the desk for corrective action when two of the girls yanked out the phone, pantsed him and forced him to drink their poisonous hard liquor until he blacked out. He awoke when police battered in the door. The girls were having a spirited pillow fight on his bed and they’d also stolen his underpants. He offered no explanation on the condoms or the lubricants, insisting they appeared after he became unconscious.

An ex-campaign spokesperson (just now quit) says all election activities will be suspended immediately, with all further efforts on hold pending the outcome of this serious investigation. Denied bail as a flight risk,  Taint remains in the Achatoochee County Jail awaiting arraignment Monday morning.

earnald busted

Citizen Taint Gets Swift-Bootied!

Way Cool Shot Of An Avid Supporter Crashing A Hillary Campaign Appearance In Iowa

spit-or-swallow

He or She is carrying this sign, just released by the campaign. Click to view the large size file. The campaign is challenging supporters to spot the subliminal message, subtly hidden in the graphic, that reinforces a strongly held principle of the Candidate. No More Nanny State.

 

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They’re The Clintons – Lying Is What They Do

LIARS

Granny Clinton Heads New Hillbillies Spin-Off

I’m not much on writing insightful reviews but this show is pretty good. Relatively speaking, of course. You have to enjoy slapstick, for starters. Granny’s hi-jinks dominate almost every episode. And Chellie Mae’s biscuits, lol…they can take out anything, except Granny! Here’s a scene where Granny confronts Old Man Sanders and threatens his life! OMG! Classic comedy you won’t want to miss!

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