Ed: (Claims that the former Speaker urinated on the President were investigated and determined to be untrue as it was discovered that Master Boehner had emptied his bladder completely during his earlier meeting with well-wishers from the GOP.)
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EARL OF TAINT 
I wonder where they got that sofa. It looks terribly cheap and ugly.
Portrait on the wall is priceless!
Thanks – I couldn’t have Abe just sitting there, taking it.