Travels With FLOTUS

Regular viewers know that I enjoy keeping up with Michelle Obama’s travels to exotic locations on my dime when I can barely afford a weekend at the beach. Each trip, I try to use my considerable influence as a semi-professional journalist to wrangle a few candid, unreleased press pool photos of the First Lady’s activities for the exclusive enjoyment of my readers.

Unfortunately, I was unavoidably delayed from coverage of her trip to Japan. But I was able to bring you these latest shots from her time in Cambodia. The girls and the First Lady Of The United States In Law, Mrs Marian Robertson, stayed on the plane.



OK, the pictures:

Here FLOTUS picks up the First Lady of Cambodia, whatever her name is.

Here FLOTUS picks up the First Lady of Cambodia, whatever her name is. And shut up, you couldn’t pronounce it anyway.

They wade over to historical masterpiece Angkor Wat. FLOTUS is on the left.

They wade over to the amazing temple at Angkor Wat. FLOTUS is on the far left.

The elephants were all broken that day

The elephant rides were all broken that day

Asking directions to rest rooms and snack bar. The monks broke their vow of silence.

Asking directions to rest rooms and snack bar. The monks broke their vow of silence with the screaming.

Buddha's Revenge

Buddha’s Revenge sends her running

BTW – I photoshopped the Hostess Cupcakes, the rest is all original picture. I did NOT ‘shop dat ass up. That’s the real deal Neal. Good luck losing the visual and I am sorry.



21 responses to “Travels With FLOTUS

  1. GruntOfMonteCristo March 23, 2015 at 8:59 pm

    Oh DEAR GOD. The elephants. The poor elephants. I can’t stop laughing, Earl. Now that’s some good journalism! I’m glad you didn’t do any photoshopping with the FLOTUSIL, unless you changed her dress pattern. That is pretty hideous. I’m beginning to see where FLOTUS gets her fashion sense.

  2. Father Paul Lemmen March 23, 2015 at 9:36 pm

    Reblogged this on A Conservative Christian Man.

  3. proofpositiveblog March 24, 2015 at 3:43 pm

    “FLOTUS is on the far left.” I’m sorry. I thought that went without saying!

  4. iratenate March 24, 2015 at 5:47 pm

    I can never eat another Hostess Cupcake….thanks a lot!

  5. papabear1950 March 24, 2015 at 6:14 pm

    OH MY ALLAH, Earl… is that last shot called “camel-ass”?! I just had a WONDERFUL dinner that is now all over my laptop. I am seriously considering litigation against you for the abdominal workout I just experienced! To look at the Wookiee ass without a disclaimer must be terrorism at the LEAST! I swear to allah, I will not be able to hold down a meal for WEEKS, you bastard, (oh, wait… I’m confusing you with the “faggot-in-chief”).

  6. Barf Simpson March 25, 2015 at 3:28 am

    Dress looks like the Philpine flag..

  7. Blue Lou Boyle March 25, 2015 at 9:06 am

    Earl, when your on, your on! LMFAO again! Thanks!!!

  8. Pingback: Travels with FLOTUS |

  9. mcnorman March 26, 2015 at 7:49 am

    Anyone else up for a bleach eyewash? When is the UN going to do something about this? It must stop or the world will become completely blind.

  10. woodsterman March 26, 2015 at 12:01 pm

    One of my prouder moments being an American.

  11. Elvis Chupacabra March 26, 2015 at 12:05 pm

    How many poor little thongs died between those cheeks?


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