Cops And Ribbers

I understand we’re paying for some person(s) at the EPA to study and propose a crackdown on emissions from backyard cookouts? Welcome to the Age of Obama.


I hereby promise and do foreswear I will resist even unto my very demise any attempt to restrict my God-given right to smoke and/or grill meats as I see necessary and proper within the bounds of my own domain. I will enlist in the militant wing of the Kingsford Brigade, I do avow! They’ll have to take my Weber Kettle from my cold, dead oven mitts! Give me Smoky, Greasy, Delicious Animal Parts or give me Death!!

These slogans practically write themselves. Give me yours in the comments and join me in Resistance to Tyranny, huzzah!

Another Possible Future
Another Possible Future



  1. Excuse me, but doesn’t The Most Magnificent Imperial Potentate realize that his very own peeps loves they some tasty ass bah bah coo? Oops, I forgot, laws don’t apply to them. Never mind.

  2. Doesn’t matter what our slogans are. The media will only report the ones from the dark side:
    Dianne Feinstein: “Nobody needs a spatula that big.”
    Michelle O’Bozo: “Our children deserve the best vegetables free of 2nd-hand grill smoke, and I will personally go harvest them from the fields of the French Riviera. BRB.”
    Nancy Pelosi: “This bill is about saving innocent herbivores from extinction. And fortunately, my husband’s multi-national corporation is poised to accept a sole-source gov’t contract to produce a tasty grilled meat alternative made from corn smut. It’s delicious, and you’ll love it. You’ll have to.”
    Lizzy Warren: “We’re just proposing a common-sense limit of 2-cutlet magazine clips for all backyard grills. That should be good enough for anybody.”
    Lena Dunham: “Grilling is the last refuge of the Patriarchy. I was once raped by a guy who grilled. It took me months to get the stench of beef tallow off me.”
    Al Sharpton: “Ain’ no grillin’ maka ’nuff fordy about what fo’.”

    1. Whut choo tokkin’ ’bout, Gruntis? (I guess I can’t understand a word Al Not-so-sharpton says unless he’s using a bullhorn.)


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