New Magazine I’m Pitching To Investors

For starters, we’d focus on the needs and interests of selected foreign markets where sex with animals is a socially accepted norm. We’ll pivot to add a domestic version once the recent immigrant communities are able to grow, solidify and impose their wretched, backwards culture on all the decent people.



  1. Heard the White House has ordered subscriptions for all staff. That sounds like a good start.

  2. Love your symbology, as always. I’m trying to figure out the significance of the exact number of flies buzzing around the stylized arabic pile of poo. I’m thinking ‘five’ as in “five fingers = one hand to wipe?” Five major pieces glued together composing the magic black rock in the Kaaba? Minimum number of wives? Oh! I got it. The fifth day of the week, Thursday, is the day that allah sleeps, so it’s ok to fornicate with people & critters it’s normally not ok to fornicate with. That’s gotta be it.

  3. Mean while back at the oasis, the Arabs were eating their dates..bahh, bahh…Allahu Akbar MF!!!!!!
    And that’s all I have to say about that……..

  4. Earl, it looks like your contestant for “Caprine-copulator” could EASILY get his “nose out of joint” by restrictions on the typical islamic “love-connection”. Maybe that’s why terrorists are so angry… they have multiple mothers-in-law, and bot flies laying eggs in their “junk”!

  5. I once asked a Mooselimb what the secret was to not getting kicked. He said, “If you’re small and gentle you will become one with the goat.”

    1. The prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, advised waitng for a moonlit night with soft breezes, then gently inserting the back legs into your boots. Inshallah, inshallah.

      1. Ah yes, the blessed goatfucks of the prophet. What does His Sunna reveal to us as to whether the goat should face us or Mecca, as we embrace, dans les bottes?

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